Title: Goat Simulator
Developer: Coffee Stain Studios
Genre: Action, Simulation
Platforms: PC, Mobile
Goat Simulator was originally meant to be a joke. The creators never imagined it would catch on like it did. Your protagonist is, as the title suggests, a goat. Your task is to rack up as many points as you can be destroying everything in sight. The open sandbox world may be tiny, but there’s a lot to do in this fantastically ludicrous game for the PC.
It must be frustrating as a developer to know that your game, which you’ve put your blood and sweat into to create stunning graphics, flawless gameplay and extensive character development, will never be as good as Goat Simulator. The comedic value of this game trumps anything you can possibly come up with as you make your way through a sandbox world full of destruction and hilarious achievements.
The game makes it pretty easy to destroy just about everything in sight. The game’s creators sacrificed Next Gen graphics for environmental punchlines like ramming a gas station to blow it up or headbutting a civilian into a cement mixer. While this alone doesn’t make a good game, it’s the extent to which the creators went to shove as many ridiculous achievements and options for destruction in the game as possible that will keep players amused.
Controls are fairly simple. You view your goat in third-person mode, watching it trot around the tiny town you’re placed in. Buttons that allow you to jump, sprint, bleat and ram are your primary functions, but there’s also the ability to go limp and play dead, as well as using your tongue to latch onto objects and drag them around. Your goat also has the gift of immortality; you can throw your goat down a hillside or let them get obliterated by a semi-truck and you won’t die.
The game is filled to the brim with glitches, but the creators have said that this was on purpose and that they don’t intend to fix them unless they cause serious problems. Civilians flying through otherwise solid objects and exaggerated physics are prevalent throughout your plotless quest to destroy, so just relax, sit back and enjoy as you explore. Collectible objects and achievements are scattered throughout the game at random with no real rhyme or reason. You’ll just have to experiment in order to find all available achievements. Expect to spend quite a few hours on them.
Don’t expect a great plot, responsive controls or fancy game mechanics. This isn’t that type of game. Goat Simulator is just plain fun. Why? Because it’s so ridiculous! The fact that you can fly your goat around with a jetpack is pure gold. The creators knew they’d struck it rich when players suddenly flocked to their website demanding more goats and more explosions. The price tag is a bit high for a game that didn’t require the normal effort to perfect things like movement and symmetry, but you’ll still have a blast playing it. All in all, Goat Simulator is going to be difficult to top should the creators attempt another game.
Goat Simulator for Android
Android users can now enjoy toting their goat around on their mobile device in the new Goat Simulator app. Your only challenge in this game is to find all the hidden achievements as you wreak havoc as a common barnyard animal.
You’re a goat, and you like to destroy things. This is the only element of plot present in Goat Simulator. You’re given an open sandbox world to obliterate at your leisure, so don’t rush. Hours of fun and comedic gameplay await you as you wander a tiny town of innocent civilians, annihilating everything you touch.
Achievements are won for doing just about anything in Goat Simulator. An onscreen joystick lets you move your goat around, and four control buttons let you lick, headbutt, jump and go limp. Hidden collectibles are available throughout the game, so if it looks like anything remotely important, it’s most likely something you want to pick up. Let your imagination fly as you wipe out on the table of a family dinner or ram through a neighbor’s barbeque. You can even soar the skies with a jetpack.
The game seems a bit glitchy, but it was designed to be that way. This can make some players cringe at the thought of paying $5 for something that the creators have openly admitted is stupid fun, but it’s up to you whether you buy it or not. It’s worth it for most just to get a few laughs out of the silly antics and enormously ludicrous gameplay.
Goat Simulator for iPhone
Your favorite (and only) goat game is now available for iPhone and iPad in the hilarious catastrophe that is Goat Simulator. Players willing to spend $5 to destroy objects and terrorize God-fearing citizens of a small town will find hours of entertainment with this new iOS app.
There isn’t much to be said about plot or structure. Goat Simulator lets you play as, well, a goat. Your mission is to score points by destroying anything in your path with your caprine abilities. Secret achievements and collectible objects abound in the sandbox world you explore.
Touchscreen controls let you use abilities like Jump, Headbutt, Sprint and Limp, while the onscreen joystick lets you move your goat around. Proper physics has been tossed away like yesterday’s newspaper, and you’ll find it difficult to keep from laughing as your goat is tossed to and fro by loosely-designed game mechanics. It’s all part of the fun. Goat Simulator is one big punchline from its creators; it’s designed to be stupid, so don’t get your panties in a twist when you get stuck falling off the edge of the map.
Despite the ludicrous physics of the game, the graphics are surprisingly good. They aren’t very detailed, but the lighting and variety you’ll find is quite nice. There’s also the fact that you get to be a goat and tear a tiny town apart piece by piece. Goat Simulator is truly unique and is worth the $5 price tag just for the hilarity.